F!

We knew each other since 2009, he was my (not so) childhood friends, we supposed to be elementary friends, but to be honest, I didn’t know him at the time. We met four years later after elementary graduation, in some elementary reunion, but nothing happen. We just say ‘hey’ then stick around in each other place, we never get closer, we just a stranger with “long lost friends” label. Maybe we meet several times in several reunion and texting several times, but it doesn’t change anything.
We have our own adventure of love, he with his girlfriend-s, crush, or girls around him. And me, I have some adventure too, from the player, the good boy, the jerk until the one I think is my true love, the one I think is my last.
We have a history who made us like we are now.
Then….
After our own upside down of love,
We met six months ago, nope, he found me full of agony – dying in hospital bed, bloody fucking bleeding because of the game I come into, and that’s a shame for me to look so weak. He walk into my life as he walk to my hospital room, and everything change.
He give some positive (mental) vibes when all I see was darkness and negativity. It’s just like I see the old me in him, the old me that I miss but I know I can’t go back to her, I can’t reach her again, even I try but yeah my history made me like I am now, and that’s life.
Months after we met, he makes me believe what I think bullshit,
He show me what I think doesn’t exist anymore,
He tell me words I never heard for a long time, a words that just exist in fairy-tale, drama movie or deep quotes.
I have no idea, he will be someone who heal me and save me from the monster inside my head. I don’t know where it is will end, or when, I don’t care. I don’t know what we do now, any (love)adventure? or we feel tired of a game we played so we take some rest and we meet each other in rest area? or we exactly have no idea and let universe doing their job.
So, wherever or whenever it ended, all I know is… 
you are the light in my gloomy day, 
you are the antidote of my toxic, 
you are the good in my darkness heart, 
and I owe you, I owe you my soul, my safe and sound. Thanks dude!

I have no idea, but look where we are now…
Oh my bloody shitty F buddy ©

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